Fireside Chat On The Beach

Many of these cruisers have been coming here to George Town for years. One 20+ year couple organized a beach cookout with hotdogs and everyone bringing sides. We arrived at dusk and sat down around a campfire on the beach to eat. It was a magic evening. I was sitting between Julie and a woman I had met earlier in the week. I remembered Sharon because when she met me she reached out and touched my hair. “Oh you have nice hair. How did you get those streaks into it?” she asked. It is bleaching out a bit with all the time in the sun. I laughed at the thought of coloring my hair but did add, “It’s one of my best features.” She smiled and agreed. I later found out that she had spent her working life as a stylist. As the light began to fade we started talking.

“What did you do before you left for life on the boat?” She asked.

I was pretty sure she knew I had pastored a church so I reminded her of that. “Oh, that’s right. I hear you are talking at beach church this week.”

“No, a week from Sunday.” I corrected her. She was disappointed as she and her husband would be leaving before that.

“But you, I am interested in your work. You have worked with beauty all your life. You make people beautiful. You are an artist with hair and how to help people as you regularly meet and talk with them.” I commented. She described her work and how she would accentuate features positive features and hide others with her work. I finally said, “But in many ways you function as a counselor or even a priest for some of these folks, don’t you?”

“Well, not a priest but I do function as someone for them to talk with. I have walked with people through all sorts of things and many have come to me for years and years. I guess I do have quite an impact on people.”

“I knew a woman at our church who was struggling with all sorts of hard things in her life from her childhood. She was not a believer in God but was envious of believers because of their relationship to beauty. She loved beauty everywhere but realized, as an atheist/agnostic, she had no basis for what she loved. She told a friend of mine, ‘you Christians, you have explanations for beauty. If there is a god, he has created beauty and you are like him. I have no explanation for beauty. I just know I love it.’”

Sharon interrupted me, “Why do you have to believe in God to love beauty!

“You don’t. Just to answer the question why you love it. If there is no God and everything is random and meaningless, then why would there be categories of beauty or ugly? Who would care? Why would you care?” I paused.

“I guess I have a hard time with stuff that does not make any sense to me like the virgin birth. I just don’t have proof of all those things, like, well, the virgin birth. How could something like that happen? And why do people have such a hard time with how the world was created. Why do you have to reject what scientists say about evolution if you believe?” She paused. I just believe that if there is a God and he is all love then we will all go to heaven. I don’t believe in Hell so if there is no God then I just enjoy my life now and then it will be over.

This was a lot of ground to cover at a campfire on the beach. I tried to see if there were questions that she wanted answered but none were picked up. I went after her view of God by telling her I was very worried about approaching God with the confidence she had because I had some problems.

“What sort of problems?” she asked.

“I am just not a very good person.” I responded.

“What do you mean? Of course you are a good person. I mean look at what you do for a living.”

Crossing swords a bit I said, “Now look, you have to let me tell you about me. How can you know more about me than I do. I know what’s in my heart. I know that all my actions are messed up to some extent. Even the good things I do can have poor or even bad motives. I don’t know if you struggle with that but I know I do. It is a sort of manipulation that do damages people and relationships.”

She laughed and pointed to her husband saying, “That’s what he says about me! He says there is always another motive in whatever I do for him! I guess everyone has some of that going on. But that’s not that bad.”

“Well the way I see it, I was built for a beautiful, honest, dependent relationship with my creator. But I have screwed that up. I have betrayed God by trying to be in control of everything. I have, in fact, played God and wanted to be God. I am at heart a rebel and a betrayer. I have defaced the image that he gave me. I live as an enemy when I live like that. I deserve God’s righteous condemnation. I believe that I am worse than I imagine I am…but I still have great hope.”

“In what?”, she blurted out.

“In the great exchange to restore my image. Jesus made a way that my record of treachery is replaced with his record of obedience and trust.  He gave me his record of beauty and faithfulness and he took my record of treachery. He then took the punishment that I deserve. That’s what happened on the cross. The most beautiful person who ever lived became the most hideous so that I might be beautiful again. So that I might be back in relationship to my creator. I live my life now connected to him. He is my source of life and hope. Obedience to him is to become more beautiful. He already proved he loves me even before I responded to him. So, I have great hope.”“I have been in church all my life. All sorts of Sunday schools and services. None of it makes sense to me. You have explained it as well as any but I still don’t get it. I am sorry.” She concluded.

“Hey, that’s fine. I am just telling you my story. God has his way of making it clear.” I said.

“Listen, we have been sitting here for a long time, I have to go off into the bushes to pee. Do you mind?”

“Great talking to you. Don’t let me keep you.” I finished.Sharon got up and started for the darkness beyond the campfire. He husband caught my eye and said, “Did you convert her yet?”

I laughed uncomfortably, and said, “Nope.” We gathered our things to head back to the boat. It was nearly “cruiser midnight”. (9pm)